where has the romance gone?

I really have no excuse as to why it's been so long, so I won't try to give any. I will say that work has been busy and J. just finished up another year of pharmacy school so it's been super busy around here. Hmm...sounds a lot like an excuse though! Anyhow. I was reading Marie Claire (I think) when I saw this ad.

via simon g

now, there has already been a lot of controversy surrounding this ad over the past few months, but I personally had never seen it in print before. Trust me, it is just as appalling as you would imagine.  First, you are assuming that your wife to be would cheat on you (sign number 1 you shouldn't marry her) and then, you are assuming that if you present her with a big enough/flashy enough ring, she will "think twice" about removing it and therefore will not be able to cheat. Seriously? Who wrote this?! And given that it's not in a men's magazine what exactly are they looking to gain here? Are there any women who would see this, rip it out, and give it to their boyfriends with a post it that says, "if you buy me this, I promise I won't cheat. Or at least I'll think twice."

Personally, I wouldn't like to know that my ring was chosen after seeing this particular ad. I mean, I understand trying to be "different" and "edgy," but I think these ads are just in poor taste.

I was a little annoyed by this so I went to the site and looked up the other ads. All pretty much just as tasteless. One suggests showing how you spent your settlement check. Great. This is about as sad as when I opened a bridal magazine in the beginning of our engagement and one of the dress articles said not to worry too much about what you wear because "this is only your first wedding."

I mean, really. I know divorce happens, but personally, I wasn't planning on what to wear for the second go round before I even had the first. Seems like you're just asking for problems. Instead, how about say something like- don't stress so much because he's not marrying the dress, he's marrying you. I'd hope that even if you showed up in jeans you couldn't change his mind.

So where has the romance gone? And no. I am not talking about some fairy tale happily ever after romance- I'm talking about the real romance. The getting married because you love someone kind of romance. The "it doesn't matter how big the ring is, it's the promise that matters" romance.  The "I promise to love you even though you always leave the cabinet doors open" kind of romance. Are we really living in such a cynical world that we are already planning the cheating and the divorce before we say "I do?" How sad. I for one, do not want to live in that world.

Maybe that's why the ads annoyed me so much. I'm still one for growing old together. For building a life together. For arguing together over paint colors and then for admitting it was a silly argument and making up. I love the old couples in "When Harry Met Sally." Their stories and quirks. The fact that none of them are perfect, but that they are in it together. (Yes, I am aware this is a movie, but you get the drift.)

I'm not alone in this, am I? Please tell me there are still people like me out there.

And now that I've ranted, I'm going to get back to my escort cards. Happy Tuesday everyone! And I promise tomorrow will be more light hearted!