I went through the last major parts of changing my last name to J's today and thought I'd share the steps just in case anyone else needs to go through the process! It wasn't really all that difficult, just a little time consuming.
1st - get 2 notarized copies of your marriage certificate along with your license. When you pick up your marriage license from the court house they normally give you a sheet that let's you send a check for how many you want (they are usually around $5 each) and they will mail them to your house a week or two after the wedding. Or you can also do like me, and just drive to the court house. That only took about 15 minutes and there were absolutely no lines!
2nd- With you OLD license and a marriage certificate, head over to your local social security office. Take a number, get out a magazine, and be prepared to sit anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours. The whole process only took me about 40 minutes, but if you going during a peak time (like lunch) it could take a lot longer. Once you prove who you were and who you want to be, they will get you to sign a few forms and a free new card will be on the way to your house!
3rd- Head over to the DMV. Make sure you have your old license (which you will give up) and your marriage certificate and be prepared to wait a little here too! Oh! and don't forget to get here soon! If you go within 60 days of the wedding (check that though, they may have changed the time limit) they will replace your license for free. Otherwise, you'll have to pay for your new ID.
4th- Now you need to update your passport! Don't forget that if your passport doesn't match your license, you won't be allowed on the plane- no matter how much you beg! This is why you shouldn't book your honeymoon plans under your new name either- none of your information will match! Find a post office that takes passport applications, bring a large envelope, your new license, a marriage certificate, your old passport, 2 2"x2" photos of yourself taken in front of a white or off-white background, a $75 check, and this form and they will do the rest for you. In a few weeks, your beautiful new passport will be in your mailbox!
5th- Don't forget to go to the bank, call the credit card companies, cell phone providers, utility providers, etc and make sure to update your name with them as well. some will only need your new ID, but others might need your marriage certificate (that's why I said to get 2- one has to be mailed with your passport application!)
Hope this helps everyone and happy waiting!!